That's right, its the afternoon delight!
welcome welcome
To get my plug out of the way, listen to the Throwdown with Rubes and Gordo on sunday nights at www.blogtalkradio.com/throwdown, or check out their facebook group.
Note: I pick and choose what qualifies as news stories for my blog, so even if something important (in your world) happened today, I may not report on it.
Sticking with yesterday's more lax format, I am just gonna lay the stories out there for ya. Starting with...THE STORY OF THE DAY!
This was not as controversial as yesterdays, apparently some have felt that a man marrying a dog should have beaten out the pot-bellied pig chase 07. I stand by my decision, it is more of a visual thing for me. Which would you rather see, a man and a dog in traditional wedding dress? or 5-10 people running around chasing "uncatchable" pigs for 35 min? Obviously its the pigs.
Once again the United States is the winner of today's story, still no updates on the big monkey thugs.
Today's winner is.......
Man shoots lugnut with shogun:
A 66-year old man in Washington state tried using a shotgun to remove a "stuck" lugnut on the wheel of his car. This proved to be a bad idea. The buckshot (you honestly thought he would use a shotgun shell? what is he stupid?) from the gun deflected off the wheel and "peppered" his entire body up to his chin, causing "sever, but not life-threatening" injuries. Officials have reported he was in fact NOT drunk. http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/21758302/
My Two Cents:
This would be so much funnier if the man was not 66. Either way you would think he had other options, perhaps using I dunno...a torque wrench? This is absolutely the story of the day.
Coming in at a not too distant second was this gem:
Woman caught dumping ashes in Disneyland:
Park officials have closed down the ever popular "Pirates of the Caribbean" ride after seeing a woman dump what appeared to be human remains into the water. According to some Disney workers, this is not uncommon. Peolpe have been smuggling in ashes for years.
My Two Cents:
Gross. Can you imagine going on a plume ride and getting splashed with a face full of someone elses ashes? That will most likely never happen, but still. Also who's dying wish would be to be spilled into the "pirates" ride? I mean yea, keira knightly is hot and all, but not THAT hot. There are some wierd people out there...
Hilary like Pearls AND Diamonds:
Yes, this was actually a story on a major news site. Booooooo.
"Ms. Southwest" poses for Playboy:
You all remember Kyla Ebbert? I know I do. She was the 23-year old passenger with the sexy body, who was asked to leave the plane on her Southwest flight and was forced to put on a sweater covering her legs. She has great legs. Anyways, she now has posed for Playboy in some "tastefully done" photos. Kyla said the biggest challenge was convincing her father to let her pose. Gee, I wonder what his problem was?
My Two Cents:
My favorite thing about this story, originally, was that the passenger who complained about her was an elderly woman. Of course no guy on that plane had a problem with it. I love how "tastefully" is the one and only word used to describe naked photos that aren't straight up hard-core porn. They need to get a new word so they can be used interchangeably, "Tastefully" is now a tainted word. I don't think ms. ebbert should have been asked to leave the plane, because while her skirt was pretty short, she was wearing a very tasteful outfit.
Russian cult holed up in cave:
This is a pretty wierd story and it's a shame because it does not look like it will end well. A small 20-25 person cult who call themselves the "True Russian Orthodox Church" are currently holed up in a cave they dug in Northern Russia. They have retreated to the cave because their leader has recently been arrested and is under psychiatric review. There are children in the cave, where temperatures have reached -50 degree. The members have told police that if they try to get into the cave, they will commit a mass suicide. They believe the "end-of-days" is coming in May 2008, and they are going to wait it out in the cave.
My Two Cents:
Unfortunately, this is doesn't look good. How are they gonna get them out of the cave? the leader isn't being released, the cops aren't gonna back off, and the people really will kill themselves if they have no hope. This is what happens when you start a cult. Lesson today is not to start cults unless they are not crazy. I hope this one results in them getting out of their alive.
Don't Blame the Whiskey!!:
In an unfortunate turn of events, thousands of bottles of Jack Daniels has been confiscated and may be poured out if it has been sold illegally. Some of these bottles are vintage and the oldest is from 1914, it is worth around $10,000. A little quip from this article:
"Punish the person, not the whiskey," said an outraged Jack Daniel's drinker from British Columbia who promotes the whiskey on his blog. "Jack never did anything wrong, and the whiskey itself is innocent." for the rest of this sad article-http://www.wsmv.com/news/14608054/detail.html , and may god have mercy on this whiskey. Amen.
Fox News had a headline today that read "Massive Massacre". Can somebody please pay me that person's salary to come up with better headlines? I mean seriously, c'mon. Massive massacre? WTF-that's Fox News for ya.
Raccoon killer!
A teacher in Arkansas shot a raccoon with a nail gun in order to show his class how to skin the animal. The raccoon was brought in by a parent and it was supposed to be dead, but it was delivered alive in a cage. The teach took it out back to his truck, with no students around, and shot it with a nail gun.
My Two Cents: Gots to loove dem rednecks. The best part about this is not that the teacher killed the raccoon, or even that a parent brought it in, alive in a cage! No, the best part was that the f-ing lesson for the day was how to properly skin an animal! Amazing, purely amazing.
Hugh Hefner donates $2,000,000 to film school:
Apparently the film school is already named after him, this is just another donation. I think it was for USC. How awesome would it be to have a diploma from the "Hugh Hefner Independent Film School"? You would be an instant porn director. While I don't know what the name of the school actually is, I think mine is better.
following up on yesterday's article about Tom Cruise looking like the Fearless Leader from "Rocky and Bullwinkle"-here is the picture. http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/21794678/
A revolutionary study has come out that teens use AIM to say things they would never say in person. Wow this really blows my mind, my whole world has been turned upside-down. Who's job is it to do that study? its more like an 8th grade project.
Amy Winehouse was booed off stage after another shoddy performance. I have a friend who once told me she was hot. She is atrocious looking. I don't get why rockers can't just do that drugs before and after their shows, that way they won't slur their words and get booed off stage.
DVW's bringin the bottle, I'll see you all at KC.
Keepin it real from the loop.
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