Thursday, March 27, 2008

R.I.P. Mr. McMuffin

Today is a sad say for fast food breakfast fans. Egg McMuffin creator Herb Peterson died last night at his home. He was 89.
Do you think he was actually the first person to invent this food? Or was her merely the man who gave it a name? Either way, he is an icon in the fast food breakfast world. I wonder how he felt about the McSkillet Burrito.

A 10-year old girl tried to rob a store in Franklin, Tennessee with a rock last night. She demanded the money from the register three times before she threw the rock at the clerks chest. She only had the one rock, and was then out of ammunition. When the clerk came around the counter she fled from the scene and he called the police. He said the main reason he called police was that he was worried about the girl being out so late and trying to rob a store.
It would have been so much funnier if she got the money.

In a much funnier robbery story, an 18-year old in Chicago tried to rob a muffler shop at gunpoint. The employees informed him that they did not have any money and that their boss will not be by to open the safe until later in the day. The teen then gave them his phone number and instructed them to call him when their boss shows up so that he can rob him. The men did call him, but also called the police. The boy was arrested after being shot in the leg.
What a dumbass.

Thats all for today.

Keepin it real from the loop

Wednesday, March 26, 2008

WALMART

I don't really feel like writing about this article, but you should read it. Its pretty messed up. Yes I understand the legal mumbo-jumbo about it, but still exceptions can be made.
http://www.cnn.com/2008/US/03/25/walmart.insurance.battle/index.html?iref=mpstoryview

A study released today traced the lineaology of the three presidential candidates.
It found;
"McCain, the Vietnam War veteran who spent five years as a prisoner of war, descends from a long line of kings: Scottish King William the Lion, English King Edward I and French King Louis VII."

"Obama; the son of a white woman from Kansas and a black man from Kenya, is cousins with six U.S presidents, including Lyndon Johnson, Harry Truman and Gerald Ford. He is also linked to American artist Georgia O'Keefe, the Duchess of Windsor and two men who signed the Declaration of Independence. Most surprisingly, Obama -- the man who could become America's first African-American president -- is linked by ancestry to Robert E. Lee, who commanded the armies of the Southern slave-holding states during the American civil war. "

Clinton: shares ancestors with Grammy Award-winning singers Celine Dion and Madonna.
NOW I understand why I dislike Hillary so much. I knew she rubbed me the wrong way. Its the Celine Dion in her. Thank god for studies like this.

In other news, Russian long-range bombers were AGAIN intercepted by NATO jets over Alaska and escorted back to their airspace. I really don't get why they are toeing the line. All it takes is one slip by a pilot and we are in WWIII. All because they want to look "tough".

Finally, French President Nicolas Sarkozy (AKA Kevin McDonald) has an extremely hot wife. That's not new news, but it is tried and true. Nude photos of the former super model are going to be held at auction in NY.

That's all for today. Leave a post if you dare.

Keepin it real from the loop

Tuesday, March 25, 2008

What About Yee? Opening Day, Panda Sexercise and More

Hello all. First off I would like to apologize again for not posting in a while. I have gotten lazy I guess. But fear not, I've got some goodies for you today.

I would also like to give props to two of my readers who HAD A DISCUSSION in the comments section. That is multiple postings my friend, ain't no joke.

Ok, some politics. Hilary or O'bamma?

Let's start with Hildogg. Hilary is under fire this week for comments she has made recently referring to her 1995 arrival in Bosnia. She has apparently made these same comments repeatedly over the past few months in order to strengthen her appearance as an experienced foreign policy official (Which she's not).
What are these comments? Well Hildogg said that when she arrived in Bosnia, they arrived under intense sniper fire.
"I remember landing under sniper fire. There was supposed to be some kind of a greeting ceremony at the airport, but instead we just ran with our heads down to get into the vehicles to get to our base."
This quote is part of a dramatic description she gave at a rally last week. The thing is, the video footage of her landing shows her and Chelsea slowly walking out of the plane and strolling over to a group of people waiting on the tarmac. A Bosnian child even gave her a poem.
My favorite part about this whole thing is that when called out on being a big fat liar/exaggerator Clinton responded that she "misspoke" about the event. " I say a lot of things -- millions of words a day -- so if I misspoke, that was just a misstatement," She also has changed her story a few times in order to rework it so that she is not lying. "Now let me tell you what I can remember, OK -- because what I was told was that we had to land a certain way and move quickly because of the threat of sniper fire. So I misspoke -- I didn't say that in my book or other times but if I said something that made it seem as though there was actual fire -- that's not what I was told"
I just don't get why she has to lie this badly. Usually candidates just lie about scandals and policies they will enforce, they don't create more lies for no reason.

Obama. He is making himself look sillier everyday. I know he is a black man and its hard to stay away from a race discussion, but he's got to get past it. I think he looks silly lingering on his Pastor and on race discussions. If Clinton wasn't so stupid to be making up stories that can so easily be dissproved, she would be gaining huge ground on him right now.

I found an article about the world's tallest man, he's 8''5!! wow. Check him out.
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/23781322/

A 1 1/2-year-old black-and-white Chihuahua named Conan prays with his owner daily at a Buddhist temple in Japan. He has quickly learned to stand on his hind legs and push his paws together to pray.

A D.C. man was bitten by a rattle snake that was hiding in his luggage. The man had just come back from a trip to South Carolina and reached his hand into his bag to unpack. He came back out with a bite. The snake had managed to sneak in at some point during the trip and apparently enjoyed it in there. Firefighters froze and killed the snake with a carbon dioxide fire extinguisher.

A donut truck in Illinois was stolen from a hospital while making a delivery. The driver then crossed state lines into Iowa with the truck. Later in the day a Toledo sherriff saw the truch and gave chase along with eight other officers as backup. They caught up with the truck and arrested the man at gunpoint. The officer claim they had no idea what was in the truck, just that it was stolen. SUUUUURE. They still got free donuts as a reward.
All in a day's work.

Animal handlers in Chine are using "sexercise" to try and motivate giant pandas to get down. The species is near extinction and has a notoriously low sex-drive. They are teaching the males a sexy dance and younger pandas watch others have sex in order to learn different ways of mating. This method seems to be working to an extent, as opposed to past attempts where zoo workers showed them porn twice a day to get them in the mood. There is no mention as to whether it was human or panda porn. I think hustler makes panda porn.

Finally, a corn-flake in the shape of Illinois has sold on E-bay for $1,350. I really can't write more about this because its so pathetic. But its true. ITS A FUCKING CORN FLAKE!!!!

Today is opening day, atleast in Japan where Redsox just beat the A's in extra innings.

That's all for today, leave a post if you dare.

Keepin it real from the loop.

Thursday, March 13, 2008

Fat Mafioso's, Spy-gate, and Red Hot Sibling Looooove

THIS-IS-THE-AFTERNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOON UP-DAAAAAAAAAATE!
The newly revamped Afternoon Update I might add.

First up!! We've got Candy-Gate 2008.
Michael Sheridan, an eighth-grade honors student in New Have, Conn. was suspended and stripped (stripped!) of his honors status and his position of class VP for being caught buying a bag of Skittles from anothe student. Connecticuit schools have a ban on candy on school property. After reviewing the situation, the school board has decided to be lenient (THIS TIME) and to restore the boys honor as Vice President of the 8th grade.
I salute their decision and I hope this young man has learned a valuable lesson. And that lesson is that some of the people who make these rules are absolute nutjobs.

In much more odd news, a woman was surgically removed from a toilet seat. The woman had been sitting on the seat for two years, with her boyfriend bringing her food and drink everyday, and trying to coax her off the seat. He finally (after two years) called the authorities for help. The issue was that he skin had grown around the seat and she was literally attached to the seat.
I would appreciate any of you to leave your own comments on this one. PLEASE.

As promised, I have some red-hot-sibling-love for yaaas.
The Supreme court in Germany has ruled to uphold the current law that incest is a criminal offense. The law was being challenged by a 31-year old German man who has four children with his sister who is in her early 20's. The man was given up for adoption when he was four years old. Then in 2000 he was introduced to his biological mother and his sister. Apparently sparks flew and they had some children together.
Now I understand that since they weren't raised together, there is some type of detachment in their (her) minds about the familial connection. HOWEVER, common social practice should nonetheless instilled a red flag in their brains when they decided to get it on. And kids?!
How many birth defects could they have? I think its gross, "love" be damned, you dont screw your sister and even MORE so you don't have kids with her.

800 small dogs were rescued from a mobile home in Tucson, Arizona yesterday by animal control officials. The dogs were being kept inside a triple-wide mobile home by an elderly couple who claimed that they were breeding the dogs to sell. While the dogs were well fed, their living conditions were extremely inadequate, mostly because there was poop everywhere. The dogs breeds were mostly Chihuahuas, terriers and Pomeranians.
800! that is so many freaking dogs. 800? in a mobile home? how do you move?

Finally, a reputed mobster in Italy has been released from prison and send home under house arrest because he was too fat. Salvatore Ferranti, who weighs 462 lbs. was too fat to fit into the prison beds, and some prison cells. guards complained about having to helphim get dressed and undressed, help him bathe, and use the facilities.
At least there is no flight risk.

That's all for today, leave a post if you dare.

keepin it real from the loop

Wednesday, March 12, 2008

You go Moko!!

A bottlenosed dolphin named Moko saved two pygmy sperm whales that were going to be euthanized after they beached multiple times off the coast of New Zealand. Moko is known by the locals for hanging around and playing with people in the water. The whales had been shoved off the beach multiple times, but could not find their way over the sandbar. Resuce workers were going to euthanize the whales in order to spare them a prolonged death.
YO GO MOKO! Screw Flipper, this guy should have his own show.

Also a man and his girlfriend were at the airport on their way to a Caribbean cruise when an airport security officer noticed a small black box stashed in a sock, and wanted a closer look. The officer then opened the bags, pulled out the box and removed an engagement ring from the velvety little black box. It doesnt take an Einstein to figure out what was inside that box.
So the man's engagement plans were ruined by a dambass security official. He still proposed, only at the airport, she said yes, and that is what is important blah blah blah.
I'd be pretty pissed.

I know these posts are getting weaker but I'll make up for it soon, I promise.

Keepin it real from the loop

Tuesday, March 11, 2008

qucikly

I wasn't going to post anything today, but I cam across this article.

It is interesting enough, the article is about 1 in 4 teenage girls in the U.S. have alteast 1 STD.
Even better is the photo depciting a black man with a white girl. It somewhat gives off the image that he is going to give her the STD.
But maybe I am just seeing things. YOU decide. http://www.cnn.com/2008/HEALTH/conditions/03/11/teen.std.ap/index.html

Friday, March 7, 2008

OK

So, assuming this is what the problem was, I have now switched the settings on the comments to allow any users to post. You can now be anonymous is you'd like, but owning up to opinions is always welcome.

Not too much good stuff today, I know I have been inconsistent with my postings, mainly because I hate writing about awful news, and this has been a particularly bad week. However, I have decided that just like when this blog began way back when, it will cover everything.

Starting with...An Elvis impersonator who showed up to his hearing in Nicholasville, Kentucky stinking drunk. The hearing was for being a creepy stalker. Mr. Presley was held in contempt and sentenced to 3 days in jail. This is pretty much the whole story, I just thought it was silly.

You ever notice how when its a short-term kinda thing it is referred to as jail, but when someone goes away for multiple years they go to prison. Kinda like the movie "Let's go to prison" which was hilarious.

The 3rd annual Amsterdam "Stiletto Race" was recently held, in which young women race at top speed in a minimum of 3 1/2 inch heels for a cash prize of $15,000. This is slightly less popular than that annual "Drag Races" held in Dupont Circle in which the racing is somewhat similar, only it is large muscular drag queens running instead of 18-year old girls.

Here is a quote from a Jpost article regarding the UN Security Council's failure to condemn yesterday's terrorist attack at a Jewish seminary in Jersusalem. The resolution to condemnt the attack was blocked by Libya, a non-permanent member, because they wanted to pass the resolution with a clause condemning Israel's operations in Gaza.

"Ambassador Vitaly Churkin of Russia, which currently holds the rotating monthly presidency of the Security Council, expressed his frustration over the fact that UNSC member states could not come to a decision to issue a condemnations for a terror attack and were instead getting bogged down by complexities over the history of the Israeli-Palestinian conflict. "

"What kind of specific horrendous terror attack in the area will it take to make the Council condemn without going through all the history of the region," he said.

Amen brother.

And finally, Minnessota recently passed a ban on smoking in bars except for actors smoking in theatrical productions. In response to this, many bars have now "become" theatres, passing out playbills and encouraging patrons to come dressed up in costume in order to be proclaimed
"actors".
Oh you sill Minnesotans and your crazy antics.

That's it for today. Leave a post if you dare.

Keepin it real from the loop.

Tuesday, March 4, 2008

shame

SO Drew Barrymore has donated $1 million of her own money to charity. Cool. To be honest, that shouldn't be such big news, every fucking celebrity with mega-millions who get paid because we like their acting or singing should be giving that kind of money to charity. I dunno, maybe they do. Maybe they just dont flaunt it out to the media in order to take lots of credit for it. In that case, shame on you Drew Barrymore!

A man had his buddy shoot him the the shoulder so he could skip work. No joke.
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/23421911/

and of course I saved the best for last. A man in St. Paul Minnesota punched a woman and an old man while waiting at a bus stop. The man was waiting for the bus so he could go to his anger management class. HAHA. I mean atleast he is sorta trying right?

That's all for today, there was some horrible stuff in the news but its not going to be posted here. Look up "marines and puppies" on youtube if you want.

Happy retirement to Brett Favre. Happy trails to Hillary most likely.

Keepin in real from the loop.